A reminder that as a Mother I am not in control

And a woman who held a babe against her bosom said, "Speak to us of Children."And he said:
Your children are not your children.They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts. For they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;For even as he loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.
~Kahlil Gibran


Thought you may want to know

That's it, I am planning on holding my breath until we get our court date.

Just in case anyone cares.

Sorry, sorry... just trying to keep some humor here!
We have been waiting for a court date for 1 month, 3 weeks and 3 days!
It's getting a tad bit old.


2nd dossier officially made it to HH

I checked with our case worker Christy this morning and I am happy to say our 2nd dossier has made it's final approach to Hannah's Hope, Ethiopia. Now we sit and wait some more for a court date. I know I sound like a broken record when I say "WE STILL DON'T HAVE A COURT DATE" but we don't. We received our referral on March 5th and we are still waiting for the phone call saying that we have a court date. I think that our case worker is so tired of me checking on if we have our court date yet but I can't help myself from asking the question. I really am not one to be much of a squeaky wheel but I have been a bit nervous after our mishap with our 1st dossier. I can also say that I am a bit of a control freak and I would rather be over in Ethiopia myself to hand the dossier over to the courts. Ahh, then again I am sure Almaz, the director of HH will do a much better job than I, plus she speaks Amharic and I do not. Alamz, the in house director at Hannah's hope is an amazing woman, so I have been told and many people have even called her an angel so my faith is in her right now and I can only pray everything will work out in the end.

On another note today was the first day that I have let the kids walk to school by themselves. Well kind of by themselves. We live about 8 blocks from school so they have a bit of a ways to walk. So I drove up to the block behind them then shot across and met them a few blocks in just to be sure they had made it safely. Johnathan just turned 10 and Aubrey is 8 so don't think I am being too over protecting. I know I was riding my bike all over town by myself at that age. I also grew up in a smaller town then we live in now. I think it was good for them to gain some independence plus they have been begging me to let them so I think they're ready. We'll see about the rest of the week.

Happy Tuesday!


Something so precious

So while I wait and wait and wait some more for our court date I gaze at my desk top on my computer at these very precious perfect lips and dream of the day I will be able to kiss them.
Or maybe what noises or words will first come out of this tiny perfect mouth. I haven't gotten any pictures of a true smile so I wonder what that "3 month old perma- smile" will look like with these lips. I wonder if his big brother and sister will make him laugh as much as they make me laugh. I pray the courts review our paper work in a speedy manner and give us our court date we have been waiting so long for. Tracking our 2nd dossier it is now leaving Germany and on it's way to Addis Ababa and should arrive in a few more days. So you now you know what I'm looking at while I wait.


Baby on the brain

Baby on the brain, baby on the brain. hi ho the merry oh I have baby on the brain.

Lately I can not think straight at all. I will go back and check something I had done earlier in the day at work and think to myself, "What the heck was I thinking" Then I remember I was thinking of our little one so far away and the journey of bringing him home.

Yes, I do think I have lost it for sure!!

Still awaiting a court date. It would be nice to have one soon but I truthfully don't think it will happen until next week hopefully! There was a slight mishap with our first dossier and the shipping of it so we have gotten it all straightened out now and waiting patiently for our court date. Please pray our court date comes soon.

Even if our court date was not for another month or so I would be okay just to "HAVE A DATE"

Oh well, God has a plan we just need to wait.

So this past Sunday at church a family (members of our church) from Cameroon came with their 2 month old baby for the first time. I was wondering why she hadn't come to church with their newest yet and was worried that something may be wrong. No, nothing was wrong. During church our Pastor announced that in Cameroon it is tradition to not take your baby out in public (except for medical needs) or let anyone else meet your baby until your church family has met the baby first. Wow, do these people have their priorities straight or what? Afterwards we were all invited to their home for lunch and a gathering to celebrate their baby first meeting. They showed us videos of there home land and told us about their culture. The kids loved it and learned so much from the whole experience.



No court date yet! We are praying to hear something soon! We have been trying to stay busy to help the time pass but truly it's hard not to think about it.


Just a little update that means so much

So we have no word yet on our court date. I am hoping to hear something soon. Our social worker just returned from Ethiopia. She sent us new pictures on Thursday along with this little bit about our son.

"A" has plumped out and gotten darker than his original referral pictures. He is so handsome! I think he really likes to be held because I would watch him just melt into the special mothers whenever they would feed him and then he would fall asleep in the process of his burping right there on their shoulders, as content as could be, his little mouth twitching into smiles every once in a while. It was so cute.

If he loves to be held then he's coming to the right home because I don't think we'll ever set him down. We are one cuddling family and it sounds like he'll fit right in. He is getting so big and he is absolutely adorable. He has the cutest little button nose with perfect little lips and huge almond eyes. I so just want to hold him, kiss him all over and snuggle him. I can't show pictures on here until we bring him home so you'll need to take my word for it that this little boy is a cutie!!

Please pray that our court date comes soon and goes smoothly.


So This Is What Dreams Are Made Of ?

So I've been a little stressed lately. We haven't received a phone call to let us know our court date yet and it's wearing on me. I was completely okay with waiting for the referral and I was okay with the wait for the first few weeks but lately it has been on my mind continuously. It's not feeling of not being able to wait for a vacation or the purchase of something that you really wanted it's more like a heart sick feeling that only a mother/ father would recognize. The feeling of missing your kids or worrying about them and not being able to do anything about it. I have also been running around like chicken with it's head off getting ready for my entire family to visit for the weekend. So last night I went to bed exhausted from running around trying to get things under control last minute along with the heart sick feeling.

So here's where the dreaming part comes in. About 3am I awoke to the light of the moon blasting through the window like a bright flash light. I was then up for a couple hours thinking about the adoption and the wait along with other things. Finally after laying awake for hours I decide to pray for some patience and peace during this time. I finally fell asleep. Once I was asleep I had a dream that Matt had gone to the orphanage and picked up our baby boy for the day to bring him to my work and surprise me. I held him, hugged him and kissed him. Matt needed to take him back because it wasn't time for him to be with us yet. When my alarm went off I woke up to a card that was left on top of the alarm clock sometime in the middle of the night by Aubrey. I opened it and on the cover it said "HOPE". Inside she wrote a little note that she was hoping

that spring would be here soon (it's been a cold spring thus far) and wished me a Happy Easter. After having a dream of holding our baby boy and waking up to a card saying HOPE on it from my ever thoughtful daughter I felt a peace come over me. So funny how GOD answers our prayers.

Happy PEACEFUL Easter to all!

What's a post without a picture. Here is a photo of Aubrey making me pancakes one morning. She is only 8 but is the most thoughtful, helping 8 year old I know.
I love you Aubrey Rose


Going a little nuts here!!!

I thought if I stayed as busy as busy could be I wouldn't realize the wait for the court date. I just want to hear something. I so just want to know that we made the cut off before they(Ethiopian Courts) break for August and September. I know it may seem a little far off but these things swarm my brain as I wait patiently for a phone call from my case worker telling me our court date. So let it be known that even if you have a husband, 2 children at home with you, 2 dogs, 1 loud bird, and a gecko named echo that we got from Petco, you will constantly have your child that is half way around the world on your mind NON - STOP. I think because I do not like "not having control" over something this bothers me even more because he isn't here with us. I do not know his every move of the day. I do trust that the care he is receiving from Hannah's Hope is nothing less then the best and I do trust in God and that he is watching over his every move, it's just getting a little difficult. Hopefully my case worker has gone through the million photographs she took while in Addis and we can get an update. I really need an update right now. Okay enough venting from me. I am still prepareing for my family to come for Easter and I am in the midst of planning an orphanage shower to gether donations just all for the sake of makeing time go faster amongst other reasons.



Happy Birthday Johnathan. It is hard to believe that you are already 10 years old. I remember the day you came into this world as though it was yesterday. I treasure every moment we share together and look forward to all of the great things I can teach you and you can teach me. Here are a list of 10 things for your 10th Birthday that I love you for:

#1: You love to make people laugh. Maybe it's because you were born on April Fools Day.

#2: You have the greatest smile.

#3: You have the greatest curly hair.

#4: You love your sister and would do anything for her even though she drives you crazy once in a while..

#5: You love music & love playing any kind of instrument you can get your hands on.

#6: You love playing sports.

#7: You are kind to everyone.

#8: You are a great friend to your classmates.

#9: You are thoughtful. In the photo above you are writing a lullaby for your new baby brother.

#10: You just ROCK!!!

Ever year since the night before Johnathan turned 1 Matt and I started a tradition to fill our children's bedroom with balloons so that when they awoke the next day on their Birthday they would be surrounded by Birthday balloons. Since the kids have gotten older we allow the child who doesn't have the Birthday the next day to stay up late and help us. After Johnathan went to sleep last night we stayed awake blowing up balloons to fill his bedroom. Below are some photos of Aubrey helping us. She got sooo tired and had about enough. We threw balloons over our loft to her and she put them into his bedroom quietly so he wouldn't wake up. Check out our craziness.